MY LAST DAY IN EDINBURGH: "I SHINE NOT BURN" [1]
The Sorceress A Painting By John William Waterhouse.
I awoke early the next morning to another grey and drizzling summer day in the beautiful old city of Edinburgh, only to find that I had forgotten to take Mackenzie the gift that I had bought him while in the highlands. It was nothing really, just bookmark bearing his clan tartan. It motto of the clan was "I shine. Not burn."
It made no sense to me that Mackenzie had been refered to as Hell Man. I knew that God was love, and so I knew that in God's eyes nothing burned, as in 'burned in Hell.' Everything shone and it shone brightly, since God was love and so He loved all beings eternally. This meant that it was not for human beings to judge, but simply for us to know that God loved everybody. I didn't know what had happened to Mackenzie.
I entered the cemetery in the morning, to once again experience the familiar 'draining feeling' that ran through my body anytime I went near it. I didn't know if Mackenzie was around and it didn't matter. I carefully slipped the bookmark beneath the entrance to The Black Mausoleum. Then I turned and made my way back out of Greyfriars Kirkyard through the damp somber headstones and rain soaked grass.
I wanted to make the most of the last day by exposing myself to as many haunted locations as I could. The first two tours that I booked into would take me back down beneath The South Bridge Vaults with Mercat Tours on a historical ghost walk and the 'parapsychological investigation'. The third would be with a completely different company: Mary King's Close Underground City Tours. They were all situated along The Royal Mile. As I was walking down the street, I had this odd feeling inside that I did not want to leave Mackenzie. I shook my head to try and adjust my weird thinking.
Then I thought of arriving back in Sydney where I was to meet my mother at the airport and her asking me if I had met anyone interesting while I had been away. Not knowing my purpose in coming to Scotland, she would be meaning romantically. I then suddenly thought of Mackenzie Knight and, what am I going to tell my mother?
I walked a few more metres. Then I turned to my left as Mackenzie reassured me:
What?! please don't worry, lover! Oh, no ... I was now afraid that he was going to keep following me. But inside I felt of several minds regarding him. I felt like I wanted to continue the interaction, but also that I didn't want to either, for obvious reasons. Firstly, I wasn't sure of who, or what I was dealing with. Also I felt guilty, like I was somehow at fault. I had never experienced a situation like this before, where it hadn't all gone my way, and so I didn't really know what to do. I hadn't meant to give him the wrong impression. I also felt sorry for him, and the sadness of leaving Scotland with so many unanswered questions weighed heavily upon me.
As I made my way towards The Royal Mile a succession of 'signs' came into view:
'Restricted Access 10pm - 5am.' Someone wanted to gain access but they were restricted from doing so. The times brought my thinking back to the cemetery.
I was told that there was an emergency escape route.
'MisFits.' A blonde. My ex-partner had refered to me as 'Misfit.' How did Mackenzie know that? [Note: On a multiple level there was more than one. He was refering to 'the girls', that being Scarlet, Sophie, Cynthia and Veronica.]
'DADDY FREDDY.' Freddy was the name of a dragon-troll-like-creature that was part of my system of consciousness. I was being told that Mackenzie was the same as Freddy, and that there was a link between Mackenzie and my deceased father.
'Time dedicated to you.' He offered to dedicate his time to me. It was flattery.
'Sites are dangerous.' I was being warned that Greyfriars Kirkyard was dangerous.[Update: 2011: And that other sites such as The South Bridge Vaults were also dangerous. This would have included stone circles, crop circles and pagan 'sacred' sites that I had visited while in England and Scotland].
'DREAD NOUGHT.' I was being told to fear nothing. That there was nothing to fear. The messages were contradictory, like I was being offered two lots of advice.
'SO GO.' I was being told to go back to the cemetery.
'PLACEBO. BATTLE FOR THE SUN.' I was being told that something was going to eclipse the light of my soul and that there was a battle going on.
And that there was chains involved.
'Celtic Desire.' This was a theme. I had seen the word 'celtic' when a ring had materialised in Darwin several months before coming on the trip. I had the ring on my finger as it meant alot to me that angels had given it to me.
'YE TO EYE.' You To Me. It was a Puma. He was saying that I was his through the use of a large cat with a predatory look in its eye. [Update: 2010: Photo not in correct sequence since I changed the file name. But it was taken around this time.]
'this way' This is what I used to say to my dogs Binda and Kindi. It was the entrance to a some kind of sleazy nightclub or brothel. When I looked upon some guy was standing in full view of a window, jumping up and down and pointing to his penis.
The devil and the month of September.
I was led me to a doorway with the letter of my first name [C] above it.
I would also photograph something that didn't mean anything. But there were certainly more hits than misses.
'VULTURE'. There was a vulture hanging around. There were Crime Stoppers. The number 222 was partnership and duality. The number 555 was Mackenzie's number.
This was meant to represent myself and him. He seemed to have quite an ego. He was coming across as arrogant and superior with myself as meek and mild.
'THEIR NAME LIVETH FOR EVERMORE. TO ALL FALLEN IN WAR.' There was a war going on - an unseen war, in the 'spirit' world.
'It's a jungle in here! Welcome to my world!' The location was interdimensional. There were alot of them. He was describing himself as a toad. I felt sad for him.
'FOLLOWING IN THE FAMILY FOOTSTEPS.' This concerned me. My family were spiritually dark. Did he know my family? I couldn't put my finger on it, but it was like a curse had been placed on them. I didn't want to follow in the family footsteps ...
These two weird masks were meant to represent myself and him in partnership. Me in shock and him being a monster. It was dumb. I didn't like it.
'Verona 80/ 20 BLEND.' Verona: the city of Romeo and Juliet. I was lead straight to this sign on a wall in Starbucks. He spoke through it, "Do you know how much I love you. I think of you often. In the morning always. In the evening, you make me look forward to you. Maybe tonight?" I felt him all around me, like there was an invisible force that held me. I felt attracted to it because there was an intelligence behind it that fascinated me. He wanted me to BLEND with him. I wasn't sure what to do.
I was being shown orbs. There was a link between him and the orbs.
'GOODWINS.' Good wins. I was being reassured that good wins and it had something to do, with the time of three o'clock, in the afternoon.
I was being watched, as if by a survellience camera. They were spirits. |
